God bless 'the jerk'behind the wheel

Mt. Carmel United

Methodist Church

It was driving around Washington, D.C. that taught me how prayer can conquer anger. I attended three years of graduate school in D.C., which makes three years of gridlock, near misses, road rage, and amazing-but-not-in-a-good-way driving tactics.

The upside is that none of the traffic around here fazes me, not even the dreaded Cedar Point traffic. The downside is that I could have spent three years of my life furious at the people in cars around me.

Could have, but didn't. Beginning in my second year, I participated in an accountability group at my field education church. We agreed to put into practice Jesus' command to pray for our enemies.

Our enemies were rarely recognizable by the swords they swung in our direction, so we had to define "enemies" more broadly: those who did us harm or with whom we had conflicts.

We seemed to encounter a minimum of one per mile driven in our nation's capital. This provided us with many excellent opportunities to practice the "bless the jerk" prayer. That prayer changed my life.

By praying "bless the jerk" every time someone cut me off on the Beltway, it first allowed me to acknowledge my anger to God and myself.

Pretending a near-miss is a blessing didn't work for me then or now, so I might as well be honest about it. Every time we try to be less than honest before God, we broaden the gap between God and us.

Also, if I try to pretend to myself that I'm not angry, I do not have control - the anger does. I still got angry about being cut off, but I realized I can't change my feelings, only my response.

So I choose to respond to my anger in honest prayer before God. If Jesus can transform my life, he can certainly transform my anger!

By praying "bless the jerk: whenever someone ran a red light, it removed them from enemy status and broke down the invisible walls between us.

The paradox about praying for your enemies is that you can't. Once you start praying for them, eventually they are no longer your enemies but God's other children.

Sometimes the prayer even lengthens: "Bless that jerk, because he's going to need it if he keeps driving like that!" Or, "Bless that jerk; she's going to need it when that ticket comes in the mail thanks to those stoplight cameras!" "Jerk" ceases to apply at that point. They are re-humanized, which is crucial for our times.

Eventually, praying "bless the jerk" became a way of releasing and forgiving. Sure, the other drivers still made me mad, but my anger disappeared through prayer - much like the little red convertible zipping through traffic that I would never see again.

It is relatively easy to learn to pray for the semi truck that forces us off the road, or the SUV tailgating us, or the tractor zooming along at 3 mph.

It is much harder to apply that humility and forgiveness to the people we live with every day. But there it is, pretty clear-cut: Jesus says to pray for your enemies.

And if our enemies, then also our friends and family, too, right? It isn't easy, and the prayers may start out very angry. But prayer can change our lives as it changes us. So bless the jerk, Lord. Especially when it's us.

Mt. Carmel United Methodist Church holds Sunday Morning workship at 10 a.m. and is located at the corner of CR 177 and CR 183.